OWNERSHIP: THE PRIVILEGE, THE RESPONSIBILITY, THE GIFT

Do you remember getting that birthday present?

The one you had your eye on for so long. You made hints to your parents, left sticky notes, maybe even cut the picture out from a catalog and taped it where they couldn’t miss it. You wished. Dreamed. Desired. You concocted stories in your mind about what life would be like when that item was finally yours. When it was no longer just something you longed for—but something you owned.

And then it happened. It was in your hands.

You would own it.

That moment, simple as it seems, speaks to something much deeper about human nature: our longing for ownership—for agency, for responsibility, for the right to say, this is mine.

But ownership, as we grow older, becomes more complex. It’s more than just holding the object of your desire. It can feel like a privilege, a responsibility, a right… and sometimes, a burden.

When we think of ownership, we might picture possessions—our first car, a home, a cherished piece of jewelry. But the concept goes far beyond that.

• Ownership as a privilege — The opportunity to steer our own lives, to make choices, to shape our path. It’s a gift that not everyone in the world has in the same measure, and it’s something to honor.

• Ownership as a responsibility — When something is ours, we must tend to it. That could mean caring for our relationships, showing up for our work, or holding ourselves accountable for our actions.

• Ownership as a right — We are born with certain rights: to have agency over our bodies, our ideas, our decisions. Ownership means claiming what is rightly ours.

• Ownership as a burden — Sometimes, owning our choices, our mistakes, or our obligations feels heavy. With freedom comes responsibility, and responsibility can feel overwhelming.

In behavioral science, agency is our capacity to act independently, to make our own free choices, and to see ourselves as the authors of our lives. As kids, we can’t wait for the day when we get to decide what’s for dinner, when bedtime is, what career we’ll pursue.

But as adults? We often avoid the very agency we once craved. It can feel easier to blame circumstances, other people, or “the system” rather than step into ownership. Why? Because ownership means uncertainty. It means the possibility of getting it wrong. And it means we can’t hand off responsibility for our lives to someone else.

The good news? We can reframe ownership so it becomes empowering instead of paralyzing.

Owning your life doesn’t mean you always get it right. It means you’re willing to show up for yourself in meaningful ways:

✅ Own your decisions. Even when you change your mind later, the first step is claiming the choice you made.

✅ Own your body. Your body is yours. How you nourish it, rest it, and move it is up to you.

✅ Own your relationships. You can choose how you engage, set boundaries, and nurture (or release) connections.

✅ Own your mistakes. Taking responsibility when you’re wrong isn’t weakness—it’s strength. Apologizing is a powerful act of ownership.

✅ Own your voice. Your opinions, your curiosity, your evolving views—they’re yours to express. You have the right to speak up, ask questions, and change your mind.

There will be days when ownership feels like too much. On those days, remind yourself:

1️⃣ You can change your mind. Ownership doesn’t mean locking yourself into one path forever. Flexibility is part of healthy ownership.

2️⃣ You can try something—and try something else next time. A misstep doesn’t define you. You’re experimenting, learning, growing.

3️⃣ You have resources. You’re not alone. You can seek information, advice, or help. Ownership doesn’t mean isolation.

4️⃣ You can pause. Ownership includes giving yourself permission to stop, reflect, and regroup before your next move.

5️⃣ You’re capable. Even when you doubt yourself, remember: you’ve navigated challenges before. You can do it again.

Ownership isn’t about control over everything or getting life “right” all the time. It’s about showing up with integrity and curiosity. It’s about tending to what’s yours—your choices, your voice, your growth.

When we embrace ownership as a privilege and responsibility, we step into fuller, richer lives. The kind we dreamed of when we circled that item in the catalog all those years ago.